Welcome to the blog.
The best way to use this site is to first understand the “CR James” basic philosophy which is this:
In order to have better success with a woman (i.e. wife, gf, new woman, ex-lover, etc.), focus on two “high impact factors”:
1. Increasing Sexual Value
2. Increase Sexual Tension
Let’s define both.
Increasing Sexual Value
Increasing Sexual Value refers to doing things and saying things that make her perceive you as more attractive.
We often refer to a sexual value tactic as anything that you do or anything that you say that increases your sexual value.
It could be literally be anything, such as:
Having strategic conversations.
Behaving a certain way.
Reacting to her a certain way.
It doesn’t matter.
If snapping your fingers makes her more attracted to you, then — by definition — it is a successful sexual value tactic
You see, sexual value places the emphasis on how the woman perceives you.
Why is sexual value important?
The more sexual value you have, the more “impact leverage” you have.
A good example would be a woman who looks like an ugly witch compared to a super attractive woman.
If the super attractive woman danced seductively, talked dirty and then kissed you softly on your neck and chest, you would get extremely turned on.
If the ugly witch danced seductively, talked dirty and then kissed you softly on your neck and chest, you wouldn’t get turned on.
That’s because the super attractive woman has a very high sexual value score, while the ugly witch has a very low sexual value score.
When it comes to women, your sexual value score isn’t just based on physical appearance. It’s the reason why a handsome man could have a low sexual value score (just like the witch). And an ugly/fat guy could have an extremely high sexual value score (like the attractive woman).
Rule #1: Sexual value is the most important LEVERS for your impact on a woman.
In other words, it wouldn’t matter if the ugly witch read a book called, “10 Ways To Dance Seductively” or “101 Sexy Phrases That Will Turn Him On” or “The Right Way To Seductively Kiss a Man’s Body”.
Nothing will work.
She MUST improve her sexual value first.
If the ugly witch wants to get her husband turned on, she’ll normally have to increase her sexual value first.
Maybe putting on lingerie would be enough.
In this case, she has done something to make herself more sexually attractive in that moment.
With that said:
A nice guy can increase his sexual value.
A mean guy can increase his sexual value.
A neutral guy can increase his sexual value.
Once again: Increasing your sexual value happens as a result of what you say and what you do.
You can increase your sexual value in two ways:
Way #1. By making “physical improvements” (i.e. getting in shape, dressing better, being more groomed).
Way #2. You can also increase it via “psychological concepts” which can often times have a higher impact.
Some men (in an effort to increase sexual value) will focus 100% of his effort on physical improvements.
The problem is after high school, your physical appearance isn’t the only factor.
Male’s attractiveness in Elementary School: His looks (the girls liked the cute boy)
Male’s attractiveness in Middle School: His looks + popularity (mental factors are now important)
Male’s attractiveness in High School and beyond: His looks + personality + confidence + psychological impact.
Do you remember the year when you first realized that an “ugly guy” could attract women?
For me, it was in high school.
I saw many real-life examples.
I also had two ex-girlfriends (who never knew each other) tell me about how they were sexually attracted to a particular “ugly guy”.
One of the best examples was in college. I had a short chubby friend (who I mentioned in several reports) who consistently hooked up with very attractive girls.
When most guys start to get rejected by women (in some way….either a husband who’s getting rejected for sex…or a single guy not getting second dates…or whatever), there is a tendency to focus on “increasing sexual value” by only focusing on “physical improvements” (i.e. getting in shape, better wardrobe, better grooming).
That’s not a smart plan.
Making non-physical improvements have waaaaaaay more impact!
I’ve witnessed it.
Some experts will go as far as saying that if a “super ugly guy” does things the right way, he can have any woman on earth.
Experts say this to inspire confidence, but it’s not true.
The reality is we live on an amazing planet. The birds sing beautiful songs in the morning. The stars twinkle at night. And humans have preferences.
For some women (10%), looks are very important. The guy has to be a model.
For some women (80%), looks are somewhat of a factor. The guy has to be at least “ok” + have the right impact.
For some women (10%), looks don’t matter at all. The guy could be ugly, but he needs to have the right impact.
Increasing Sexual Tension
Increasing Sexual Tension refers to doing things and saying things that make her desire you sexually.
A guy could be super handsome + have sexual value, but that doesn’t mean he understands how to get a woman turned on.
For example, I met a girl at an old job who was very attractive, but I would score her a “D” in the getting me turned on.
A guy could look like a male stripper with lots of confidence – to the point where the woman rates him with a Sexual Value Score of 97/100. But if he kisses her in an awkward way and does other things wrong, he will have a Sexual Tension Score of 14/100… meaning, he won’t be able to get her “horny” and “wet”.
With all of that in mind, the intention of this page is to clearly show the difference between sexual value and sexual tension.
I hope you find the tips and advice useful!